Man:
Why is your wife shouting at you?
Friend:
She told me to upload her photo in Facebook, I uploaded in olx.
😂😂😂😂😂😂
Mistakes do happen!!
good news or bad news
Wife : I have a good news and a bad news
Husband : I am very busy ... Just give me good news
Wife : the airbags worked properly in our new mercedes🚘
😜😝
Husband : I am very busy ... Just give me good news
Wife : the airbags worked properly in our new mercedes🚘
😜😝
In a Nursery School Canteen...
There's a basket of apples with a notice written over it :-)
"Do not take more than one, God is watching"
On the other counter there's a box of chocolates,
A small child went & wrote on it.
"Take as many as U want, God is busy watching the apples"...
NEVER ACT SMART WITH Today's Generation..!.! 😜😜
KID :- Why some of ur hair are white dad...?
DAD : – Every time you make me unhappy , one of my hair turns white…
KID :- Now understand why grandpa’s hairs are all white…
Moral :- Don’t be over smart...
😪😪
Child : Mummy why Gandhi has no hair on his head...?
Mummy : Because he speak only truth...
Child : Now I understud why ladies have long hair...
"Do not take more than one, God is watching"
On the other counter there's a box of chocolates,
A small child went & wrote on it.
"Take as many as U want, God is busy watching the apples"...
NEVER ACT SMART WITH Today's Generation..!.! 😜😜
KID :- Why some of ur hair are white dad...?
DAD : – Every time you make me unhappy , one of my hair turns white…
KID :- Now understand why grandpa’s hairs are all white…
Moral :- Don’t be over smart...
😪😪
Child : Mummy why Gandhi has no hair on his head...?
Mummy : Because he speak only truth...
Child : Now I understud why ladies have long hair...
NEVER GO TO HR FOR HELP!!!
All salary ppl must read this:-----
After 2 years of selfless service, I realized that I had not been prmoted, no salary increment, no commendation.
So I decided to walk up to my HR Manager. The manager looked at me, smiled and asked me to sit down saying: "My friend you have not worked here for even a single day."
I was shocked to hear this !!!, but the manager went on to explain, and here's the conversation that took place.
Manager: How many days are there in a year?
Me: 365 days and sometimes 366.
Manager: How many hours make up a day?
Me: 24 Hours.
Manager: How long do u work in a day?
Me: 10am to 6pm
(i.e 8 hours a day.)
Manager: So, what fraction of the day do u work in hours?
Me: 8/24
i.e 1/3 (one third).
Manager: This is nice of u! what is 1/3rd of 366 days?
Me: 122
(1/3 x 366=122 days)
Manager: Do u come to work on weekends?
Me: No sir.
Manager: How many days are there in a year that are weekends?
Me: 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays equals to 104 days.
Manager: Thanks for that. If u remove 104 days from 122 days. how many days
do u now have?
Me: 18 days.
Manager: I do give u 2 weeks sick leave every year. Now remove that 14 days from the 18 days left. How many days do u have remaining?
Me: 4 days.
Manager: Do u work on Republic Day?
Me: No sir!
Manager: Do u come to work on Independance Day?
Me: No sir!
Manager: So how many days r left?
Me: 2 days Sir!
Manager: Do u come to work on New Years Day?
Me: No sir!
Manager: So how many days r left?
Me: 1 day sir!
Manager: Do u work on Diwali ?
Me: No Sir!
Manager: So how many days are left?
Me: None Sir!
Manager: So what r u claiming?
Me: I have understood, Sir. I did not realise that I was stealing company
money all these days.
Moral - NEVER GO TO HR FOR HELP!!!
(HR-HIGH RISK.)
.
.
.
So, How many days do you work ?
😜😜😝😝😂😂
After 2 years of selfless service, I realized that I had not been prmoted, no salary increment, no commendation.
So I decided to walk up to my HR Manager. The manager looked at me, smiled and asked me to sit down saying: "My friend you have not worked here for even a single day."
I was shocked to hear this !!!, but the manager went on to explain, and here's the conversation that took place.
Manager: How many days are there in a year?
Me: 365 days and sometimes 366.
Manager: How many hours make up a day?
Me: 24 Hours.
Manager: How long do u work in a day?
Me: 10am to 6pm
(i.e 8 hours a day.)
Manager: So, what fraction of the day do u work in hours?
Me: 8/24
i.e 1/3 (one third).
Manager: This is nice of u! what is 1/3rd of 366 days?
Me: 122
(1/3 x 366=122 days)
Manager: Do u come to work on weekends?
Me: No sir.
Manager: How many days are there in a year that are weekends?
Me: 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays equals to 104 days.
Manager: Thanks for that. If u remove 104 days from 122 days. how many days
do u now have?
Me: 18 days.
Manager: I do give u 2 weeks sick leave every year. Now remove that 14 days from the 18 days left. How many days do u have remaining?
Me: 4 days.
Manager: Do u work on Republic Day?
Me: No sir!
Manager: Do u come to work on Independance Day?
Me: No sir!
Manager: So how many days r left?
Me: 2 days Sir!
Manager: Do u come to work on New Years Day?
Me: No sir!
Manager: So how many days r left?
Me: 1 day sir!
Manager: Do u work on Diwali ?
Me: No Sir!
Manager: So how many days are left?
Me: None Sir!
Manager: So what r u claiming?
Me: I have understood, Sir. I did not realise that I was stealing company
money all these days.
Moral - NEVER GO TO HR FOR HELP!!!
(HR-HIGH RISK.)
.
.
.
So, How many days do you work ?
😜😜😝😝😂😂
The Dirty Laundry 👕👔👚
A young couple moved into a new neighborhood.
The next morning, while they are eating breakfast, the young woman watches her neighbour hang the washed laundry outside.
"That laundry is not very clean", she said, "she doesn't know how to wash correctly.
Perhaps she needs better laundry soap."
Her husband looked on, but remained silent.
Every time her neighbour would hang her washed clothes to dry, the young woman would make the same comments.
About one month later, the woman was surprised to see a nice clean wash on the line and said to her husband:
"Look! She has learnt how to wash correctly.
I wonder who taught her this."
The husband said: "I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows!"
And so it is with life:
What we see when we are watching others, depends on the purity of the window through which we look.
Our life is a creation of our mind !!!😊
So let us remember this Story of 'Dirty Laundry' and clean our windows before commenting or concluding on others and Your Life will surely give a better view!
The next morning, while they are eating breakfast, the young woman watches her neighbour hang the washed laundry outside.
"That laundry is not very clean", she said, "she doesn't know how to wash correctly.
Perhaps she needs better laundry soap."
Her husband looked on, but remained silent.
Every time her neighbour would hang her washed clothes to dry, the young woman would make the same comments.
About one month later, the woman was surprised to see a nice clean wash on the line and said to her husband:
"Look! She has learnt how to wash correctly.
I wonder who taught her this."
The husband said: "I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows!"
And so it is with life:
What we see when we are watching others, depends on the purity of the window through which we look.
Our life is a creation of our mind !!!😊
So let us remember this Story of 'Dirty Laundry' and clean our windows before commenting or concluding on others and Your Life will surely give a better view!
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